Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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