chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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