i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I love you. Go after that dick
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
