dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
as a side note pls kill me
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
