just tell him i said nine months
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
