wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
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