so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
