The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Randomize
