In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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