I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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