if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
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