found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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