Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
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