Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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