im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize