do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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