Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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