Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
No more Irish car bombs ever.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
