It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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