Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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