i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
