She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
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I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
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When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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