i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Randomize
