So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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