You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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