Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
