I am puke
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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