And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
