I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
the liver wants what the liver wants
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
