not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
When are your genitals available?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
