He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
