is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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