the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize