is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
