why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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