3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
