Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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