so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
