So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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