turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
