I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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