the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
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Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
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Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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