Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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