So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
she told me i tasted like america
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
