The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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