I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Sorry my hands just texted you
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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