Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
