it was like his penis was on wheels.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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