East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
