just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
