i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
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